Wednesday, April 27, 2016

MUSIC: Charles II: King of Bling - Horrible Histories



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LYRICS: Charles II: King of Bling - by Horrible Histories. Has to be one of the best.


Charles II rap from Horrible Histories series 2.
Music: Richie Webb
Lyrics: Dave Cohen
Performed by Mat Baynton

 My name is, my name is
My name is, Charles II! 
I love the people
And the people love me
So much that they restored
The English monarchy! 
I'm part Scottish, French, Italian
A little bit Dane
But one hundred percent party animal
Champagne?

Spaniels I adored
Named after me too
Like me, they were fun
With a nutty hair do! 
Is today my birthday?
I can't recall
Let's have a party anyway
Because I love a masked ball! 
All hail, the king! 
Of bling! Let's sing! 
Bells ring! Ding ding! 
I'm the king who brought back partying! 
King Charles, my daddy 
Lost his throne
And kings were banned
They chopped off his head
Then Olly Cromwell ruled the land
Old Olly wasn't jolly
He was glum, and he was proud
Would be miserable as sin
Only sinning's not allowed! 
When Olly died, the people said
'Charlie, me hearty! 
Get rid of his dull laws
Come back, we'd rather party! '
This action's what they called
The monarchy restoration
Which naturally was followed
By a huge celebration! 
The King of Eng! (Land say! )
No sin! Too sing! (Okay! )
Or anything! 
All say, I'm the king who brought back partying! 
Great London Fire was a whopper! 
In my reign, London city came a-cropper! 
So this king did what was right and proper
Fought the fire, proved I'm more than a bopper
I'm a fire stopper! 
Married Catherine Braganza
She was a love so true
There would never be another
Well... maybe one or two! 
Lucy Walter, Nell Gwynne
Moll Davies, Barbara Villiers
You think that's bad
But her name's not as silly as... 
Hortense Mancini! 
As king, I must admit
I broke the wedding rules
But who cares when I brought back
The crown jewels?
I reinstated Christmas
Make up, sports and even plays
I was the merry monarch
They were good old days! 
When said and done! 
King Charles did run! 
England for fun! 
I was the king loved by everyone
My song is done! 
Party anyone?
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Top: Mat Baynton as King Charles II, King of Bling.
Bottom row from left to right: 3 of the many mistresses, Moll Davies, Hortense Mancini, and Nell Gwynne.

Hortense Mancini and the Mancini sisters were pretty much restoration versions of the Mitford Sisters. Do check them out, especially the book "The Kings' Mistresses" by Elizabeth C Goldsmith. Further, The King's Bed - gossip is always fun if not completely accurate. Yes that apostrophe was supposed to be after the s, implying multiple kings and multiple mistresses!

Oh, and the actual Charles II:
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1 comment:

  1. Love this post ... very amusing. What a busy fun love guy

    ReplyDelete

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